It happens every times. Words are running in my mind. All I need is a keyboard to type it down. But the very moment my fingers touched a keyboard. I didn't know what to type. I didn't have that feeling anymore. The feeling that I didn't want to do anything but type my feeling down. It's gone. It's always be.
Well, that's just a warming up. The feeling is back.
My dad was sent to a hospital since 1th of April. Doctor#1 told me after he saw an x-ray film that Dad got a nose cancer. Actually the cancer has backed. He'd got it 10 or 15 years ago and it cured. For now, it's very bad, really really bad, it can't cure. He told me to prepare for the lost. Then Doctor#2 said his esophagus (had to check on dictionary to find the word; #1) is wound and blah blah blah. The bottom line is he lacked of sodium and lead to a convulsion(this made #2). And there's something else that too difficult to describe in a language that not my native. Maybe it reach #100 if I still writing it.
Another bottom line is I don't know whether he remembers me or not anymore. Sometimes it seem like when he looks at me, he knows it's me. But sometimes he doesn't. Sigh.
He'd spent 12 days in ICU. He just moved to a normal room this morning. That's a good news.
Hope you get well soon, Dad. I miss you. I really really miss you.
Oh, by the way, He didn't got the cancer. Said by Doc#3 after he diagnose(this made #3) at a lab, not just LOOK at the x-ray film like Doc#1. But I'm glad that Doc#1 was wrong. Although I'd dissolved into tears. A LOT. I still do sometimes.
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